A GOOD GOODBYE 2009...

Bidding 2009 I have to say, it has been the best year for us, as of yet.

We laughed harder than ever, cried more than ever, lost loved ones (our dear Tigger), found new friends via blogging (Beth), traveled to many far away places. I have learned the true value of; our marriage, our family, our friends, the squad that is our second family that keeps Tommy safe every night, allowing him to come home every morning. The uneasiness of opening up to Lt. Anderson; asking for his advice, and then actually taking it (I love you for all you have done for me). The joy of new toys, the pain of workouts, the control of anger, the Peace in prayer, the ease of scholastics, the fun in outdoor play, and the importance of forgiveness.

I have loved 2009 and I have hated 2009. I suppose most have a love hate relationship with things like I do. I only have one reason to hate 2009, physical pain. It has been a doozy for me. I never let on about the pain, but dang, it kinda sucked!

At any rate, we are ushering in this wonderful new year with anxious anticipation for it to be better than ever and I have made the decision to make it a mind over matter with the body I possess.

I don't do resolutions, as I have posted about this before here! I truly do believe in bettering yourself as the days go by. I believe in giving 110% of what you have. Give to your marriage, your kids, your family, your friends, in work, in Life, EVERYTHING.

So this year I made a pact with myself. Calling it a pact is probably a cop-out. Maybe it is a resolution. That is neither here nor there. It is mine and only mine to either accomplish or fail at. Putting it here makes me more accountable. I am accountable to myself mostly. I am not one that really cares, or, I will rephrase that, one that cares at all, what people think of me. This makes me remember that people are watching. Especially Tommy. It sucks for me to let him down. I think I did that enough this past year to last a lifetime (that alone could fill a book I think). And so, with that............

I am going to be a better MOM.

I truly believe I suck as a mom. I am not the mom who runs to my kids when they fall. If there is no blood I tell them to get up and move forward. I am not a mom who worries every single second and I yell way too darn much. Our littlest Jensen gets way too many (but well-deserved) smacks and spankings and our littlest female Jensen has a mouth on her that competes with mine (and this is not something I am proud of).

It is going to be slow-going for me. I don't cook like most moms. I need to better myself in this area. Let's be honest in this one, I hate cooking. I hate most things in the "domestication" area. I have to get better here and stop comparing myself to the moms who find these things to be so rewarding. Realizing I am ME, and my kids are thriving in their own home...... and not worrying about what anyone else does in their kitchen or anywhere else is one big goal for me!

Ahhhh onto the yelling. It is a huge goal for me to even post about. I yell. I yell a lot! My kids are going to have to help in this goal of mine. They have super-selective hearing. I figure that if I stop yelling so much and start using the little tricks I learned over the years as a cop.... the house will run a lot smoother. Lower the voice and lower the tension. Either that, or, speak softly and carry the big stick! Then that just results in the spankings again, putting me at square one......... You can see my dilemma.

I figure that once I am back in the saddle with the workouts, it will stop the little annoyances that tick me off and take me into screaming, psycho Mom mode. It will also help the whole pain thing that puts me through the roof and turns me into that monster Mom that my kids do not deserve.

Yep, I am gonna be a better Mom. I don't really know what that entails. It will surely mean keeping the house cleaner and de-cluttered, making healthier meals, laughing with my family more, waking up earlier for my own time rather than taking my own time when my kids need me most, being a better wife to Tommy, giving respect in order to receive it back, yelling less, loving more; sticking to punishments and understanding them better. Remembering what it was like to be little and teaching them how to grow. Taking away privileges when needed and trusting in their decisions to learn on their own. Making mistakes and moving on and finally, just being the best, "Me," I can be, for them!


I also have to take the time to remember what my own Mom wrote to me the day Pudgie had his surgery, so very long ago.

It is the greatest gift my own mom has ever given me and I re-post it here so that I can remember, that, and to get in a good cry in this year!

PLUS I AM HOPING THAT I CAN PUT EVERY WORD OF WISDOM TO USE OVER 2010!

I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT AS MUCH AS I DID....AS I CRIED!

*

50 WORDS OF WISDOM FROM AN OLD MOM

*

I DIDN'T HAVE AN OLD MOM WHEN YOU WERE 7-8-12 OR 15 - SO LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES (MY GRANDMOTHER DIED WHEN I WAS 3 MONTHS OLD, AND MY MOM WAS 22)

*

1. ONE BITE OF TOMATO SOUP IS BETTER THAN NO BITE AT ALL!

HIDE IT IN SOMETHING ELSE.

*

2. ONE BITE OF A NEW VEGETABLE IS BETTER THAN NO BITE AT ALL-

*

3. HAVE A BASKET FOR EACH ONE AND FILL IT WITH THEIR CLEAN CLOTHES. LET THEM FOLD IT-THEY WILL LEARN

*

4. LEARN FROM ALL MY MISTAKES

*

5. REMEMBER THOSE "PRETTY" HATS YOU WERE SAVING FOR A SPECIAL OCCASION. THAT DAY IS TODAY! TOMORROW WILL COME - BUT A DRESS UP PARTY IS ONLY ONE DAY- TAKE THEM OUT. USE THEM. WHAT IS MORE SPECIAL THAN DRESS UP TIME WITH YOUR KIDS?

*

6. PUT AWAY THE WOODEN SPOON. DON'T USE IT TO SPANK. SPATULAS AND SPOONS WILL COME BACK TO HAUNT YOU ONE DAY. PICKING UP DOG POOP IS A FAR BETTER, STINKY PUNISHMENT!!

*

7. NEVER GO BACK ON ALLOWANCE-

*

8. ASK THEM IF THERE ARE ANY RULES THEY WOULD LIKE TO MAKE FOR THE HOUSE- THEY REALLY ARE JUST SHORT ADULTS AND THIS IS A DEMOCRACY-

*

9. "DON'T MAKE ME TELL YOU AGAIN?" MAYBE THEY DIDN'T HEAR THE FIRST TIME- I CAN'T HEAR HALF THE TIME, SO IF I SAY YES- MAKE SURE I KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING YES TO!

*

10. MAKE THEM READ AND SPELL OUT LOUD. IT GIVES THEM CHARACTER & CONFIDENCE WHEN THEY GET OLDER IN FRONT OF A GROUP OF PEOPLE!

*

"DON'T JUMP ON THE FURNITURE"

HEY, IT'S A CHAIR OR A STOOL- THANK GOD THEY HAVE LEGS- JUMPING HURDLES IN HIGH SCHOOL WILL BE A BREEZE!

*

SURE IT COST MONEY-THEY DIDN'T ASK FOR IT..YOU CHOSE IT AND PROBABLY PAID TOO MUCH FOR IT ANYWAY! (THANKS MOM this one bites me every time I yell!)

*

"DON'T SPILL THAT MILK"

IT'S ONLY MILK. THEY ARE TRYING TO LEARN TO POUR. THEIR HANDS ARE LITTLE. USE A MEASURING CUP- THEY WILL BE THE SMARTEST KIDS IN SCHOOL- AND AS FAR AS SPILT MILK...I AM SURE THAT GUM OR CANDY YOU HAVE STASHED COST THAT MUCH. (THAT IS WHY SHE'S THE MOM)

*

"COUNT MONEY"

THEY WILL KNOW EXACTLY HOW MUCH THEY ARE GETTING FOR ALLOWANCES.

*

"OPEN A BANK ACCOUNT"

THEY NEED TO LEARN THAT PENNIES TURN INTO DOLLARS

*
LANGUAGE - (MY WORST SUBJECT, RIGHT MOM?)

PLEASE AND THANK YOU ARE THE HARD ONES

4 LETTER WORDS LIKE: LOVE- HELP- CARE- HUGS-

ARE BETTER THAN SOME OTHER 4 LETTER WORDS AND BELIEVE ME.... SOME 4 LETTER WORDS WILL HAUNT YOU IN THEIR CLASS ROOM SOME DAY!

*

DON'T LET MOMMY'S OR DADDY'S JOB INFLUENCE YOUR CONVERSATIONS LANGUAGE. WORDS LAST FOREVER!! (being a cop has hurt us here, hard work might fix us with this one!)

*

JUST TAKE A SHORT DRIVE WHEN THEY WRITE ON THE WALL OR USE "PERMANENT" MAGIC MARKER ON THE CHAIR. THEY WILL HAVE THE ARTISTIC TALENTS YOU HAVE.. (BOY IS THERE A STORY BEHIND THIS ONE REGARDING A BLUE ANTIQUE COUCH IN OMAHA I WAS ONLY TWO )

*

RESPECT IS VERY IMPORTANT...BUT IT GOES BOTH WAYS-(AGGGH SOME DAYS I LOSE ALL RESPECT FOR MYSELF BECAUSE OF THIS MOM!)

*

HUG THE DOG.. HE REALLY IS ONE OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS. (SOO TRUE, AND WHEN YOU LOSE THAT FRIEND, YOU ONLY WISH YOU HUGGED HIM MORE!!)

*

IF US OLD "GRAMMA'S AND GRAMPA'S" DON'T HEAR YOU THE FIRST TIME- WE REALLY ARE LOSING OUR HEARING..OR MAYBE WE DON'T LIKE THE QUESTION. TELL THE LITTLE ONES TO SPEAK UP.. ALL THEIR WORDS ARE IMPORTANT TO US.

*

HAVE YOUR KIDS CALL US ONCE A WEEK JUST TO LET US KNOW HOW SCHOOL, SPORTS, OR JUST EVERYDAY LIFE IS GOING FOR THEM. IN 20 YEARS THEY WILL PROBABLY SAY- I WISH I HAD CALLED GRAMMIE AND TOLD HER ABOUT MY BASEBALL GAME.

*

THERE ARE NO "DO OVERS" FOR US AT THIS POINT IN OUR LIFE- WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET FROM YOUR PARENTS- WE ARE PROBABLY SET IN STONE- BUT WE HAVE LIVED A LOT OF WHAT YOU HAVE NOT SEEN YET.

*

ON SATURDAY MORNING - GIVE EVERYBODY A STOCKING PUPPET- DUSTING TO GOOD DANCE MUSIC WILL GO REALLY FAST!

*

TURN OFF THE T.V. DURING DINNER- IT IS AMAZING TO SEE HOW MUCH YOU REALLY CAN HEAR... WHEN ELECTRONICS ARE NOT CONTROLLING THE CONVERSATION.

*

EAT CAKE FOR BREAKFAST!!! IT HAS EGGS, MILK, SUGAR AND FLOUR..SAME AS A TORTILLA.. JUST PRETTIER! IT'S NOT GOING TO STUNT THEIR GROWTH!

*

MAKE THIS YOUR FUN TIME- YOU CAN'T GET IT BACK-(I THANK GOD EVERYDAY FOR THIS ADVICE. WE PLAY HARD IN THIS HOUSE!!)

*

SING LIKE YOUR "AMERICAN IDOLS"

HECK- ROCK STARTS CAN'T SING ANYWAYS!

*

DANCE-DANCE-DANCE...GETS THE HEART RATE UP- AND WHO KNOWS...THEY REALLY DO HAVE RHYTHM- YOU JUST HAVE NOT TAPPED INTO IT!

*

TOSS IT, KEEP IT OR TRY IT- THESE SILLY THINGS DON'T WORK BUT WHO KNOWS... THEY COULD IF YOU TRY.

*

YOU ARE BOTH GREAT PARENTS. YOU TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WELL- AND I AM VERY PROUD OF BOTH OF YOU-

*

HAVE A SILLY TEA PARTY WITH FUNNY HATS-AND FUNNY CLOTHES. IT IS SOMETHING THEY WILL REMEMBER-

LOVE, MOM

HAPPY 2010 TO YOU ALL WHO MAY VISIT OUR BLOG!