Pity Party

Well, truth be told, I had one tonight, and I am so not proud of it. Seriously.

I acted like a kinder having a meltdown and no one really even noticed... seeing as that there was no one here to really notice and the ones still present... were too busy with friends to have any idea anything was going on so I am guessing it was really no big deal.

SWEET!

When I got my "smart phone" I never fathomed all the goodies I would get to do with it. My biggest lifesaver... the emails directly to my phone. I am horrible about checking my home computer email so I have one email that I give out to a select few, to send things directly to my phone..... for important stuff.. you know PORN... I am kidding peeps!

At any rate, the last two weeks have taken its toll and by Thursday, our kinder was beyond melt down. He had hit complete disaster mode and could no longer even function. He stayed home from football with daddy and had an amazing night. Brinkley should have stayed home but I let her come to hang out with the girls, who were not even at practice. She was beat down by practices end. I think the fact that I make her run drills with the boys and at the end, she runs the suicides with the boys as well, just adds to the sheer exhaustion at the nights end.

Today we fell out of bed and laughed at the fact that it is Friday the 13th. Jax keeps repeatedly reminding me that he wants to watch that series of movies. I am pretty sure I was about his age when I started watching them. It will take until he is in high school to even finish them since there are like 897 of them now. The day went beyond smoothly for all of us.

Tommy and I spent some much needed together time at Paradise Bakery having brunch and adult conversation about his new job and the kids and catching up, literally, on the past two months that he has been presently absent for. I am not exaggerating about that at all either. It is so easy to see why cops are amongst the highest divorce rates out there. Most women can't deal with the daily menage a trois of work and family and death and court and dirt bags and phone calls and everyone else's problems and text messages at all hours of the night and blah blah blah. Seriously... people really wonder if I exaggerate that I only sleep 3-4 hours at night... come play with me!!!! You will see. With my boys position at work I always joke, we have taken on 8 new families consisting of 7 wives, 19 children, 7 husbands, many animals, psychiatric problems, scheduling dilemmas that would make your head spin, court dates, conflicting court dates, car issues, blah blah blah. It is all fun and games around here!!! Until someone pulls out one of the cards that is keeping everything balanced and then we are up the creek!!!! But we keep it all together and pretty darn well!! Until I melted down today...

We had a new schedule to deal with for work, and then a new revised football schedule that was going to save some serious family sanity and I was already ready to handle the next two weeks with some serious energy.... until the email hit the phone.

I wanted to fall over. (Going from 5 days a week for the first two weeks to 3 days a week was like snow in summer in Phoenix. We were amped to drop down to that and then we were told there would be no Friday practices due to parks with lights constraints. SWEET. I could handle 2 practices a week for 8 hours gone from the house time frame. I was oozing happy.......) We were switching back to the regular schedule to enhance conditioning and ensure athletic performance.....5 days a week again....4 hours a night. AAAAGGGHHHH! I updated my calendar, which might scare some people to look at right now, sucked it up, did a workout, and got over it. I had to break the news to Jax. It went over like a lead balloon in a kindergarten classroom. We will survive.

Then, while waiting for the house to fill up with every ones friends for our very, very impromptu sleep over... I started watching Dr. Phil. Yeah, I felt like a total D-bag dumb ass for even thinking about a pity party, let alone having one. Of all nights to complain about anything, Dr. Phil has on a couple having marriage strains due to the fact that they are the only couple ever documented with triplets that are blind and deaf. They then explained all their struggles and the scheduling and teaching issues and inability to educate the girls on their own without the help of professional assistance, how the husband felt very inadequate as a father for not being able to fix everything and please his wife and remain completely successful at work. Basically he thought he was slowly failing and the house of cards was falling in around him as he spoke. I choked on ice as he was talking.

Yeah, I have no room to whine or complain, to bitch, moan, or be anywhere near disgruntled. Tired is fine, but I sucked it up and onward we move. We have it good. Seriously. I play single mom more days than not around here, but unlike one of my friends... she lives it. Her husband is preparing to deploy, yet again, to the most dangerous area in the middle east, to continue his job of loading and off-loading the bombs to the bombers and boats and planes to transport them. And by loading them, I mean he readys them to explode. Yeah, who's complaining now? She is single mom more than she is not. Her kids don't know what it is like to have Daddy around more than 30 days a year. Her boy doesn't get extravagant pay nor does he get hazard pay. Damn skippy, that boy keeps all of us safe at night, and day! 'nuff said, I'd say.

And damn skippy, this girl has no right to bitch that she gets to take her kids to football practice at a beautiful green park, in a very expensive Escalade with more t.v.'s in it than most homes, watching 2 of her healthy kids climb tress and laugh and play with new friends while big brother does drill after drill to expand his agility and knowledge of the game, four hours a night all week long. No right to complain at all that I am tired and my house is not spotless and someone left a dirty sock under the dining room table where we never even sit at, let alone take our clothes off at, or the fact that said kiddos have been eating fast food 3 nights a week because it is just to late to cook when we get home and they need to get their tiny tired rear ends into bed.

YEAH, NO WHINING HERE.

It is Friday the 13th here and to celebrate all our good fortune and fun and crazy madness, we opted into a very impromptu sleep over. It all happened so darn fast that I am still wondering exactly how it happened. Happy Friday night!!!