Callings.....

I have never in my life ever used that word until we moved to Gilbert.... but not being Mormon is not what this is about.

Tonight I got more acquainted with the heads of the football league and their spouses. One woman's husband is a Gilbert motor so of course I gravitated to her and him. We chatted for a few seconds and when I told him I am a retired motor he knew who I was, instantly. Law enforcement..small world... seriously. So we chatted a while longer... and then the women from our team wanted to hear "my story." I told them I might cry but after they read my blog, that took six years to write, they were astounded that I even help with football, let alone actually workout with the boys.

After a while one mom asked about seeing the light... all the typical questions I have been asked millions of times. And then she said the phrase that runs through my head every day... hundreds and hundreds of times over and over....

"GOD HAS BIG PLANS FOR YOU, THAT IS WHY YOU ARE ALIVE TO DAY!!!"

I told her that I truly believe that too.. but dang it, I wish God would just come out and tell me what that plan is.

She looked me square in the eye and said, "This is your plan DeANNA, you are here to help your children. To help Jax become the great football player that he is already aiming to be. To teach your children and to be their mom everyday. THIS IS YOUR PLAN."

I kid you not, it was like she had just smacked me across the face. I have heard that millions of times and heck, I have said it over a million times myslef, albeit....very sarcastically. I had always known how lucky my kids and my husband are that I get to stay home and keep track of homework and shots and shoes and uniform lanyards and shoe shine kits and mechanical pencils and clean underwear. I knew that from the day I officially retired, and I knew that I didn't like it one bit.

Tonight was different. Something clicked when she asked what it felt like to be on a ventilator and what goes through your mind when you can't breathe on your own. How you learn to walk again and if I really saw the light everyone talks about. Not only did it click, it was like a fire alarm going off in my ears that would not stop ringing.

I looked out to Jax on the field, just as he dove and caught a pass. His team ran around him and were so excited ... cheering and yelling and smacking helmets. I looked at Pudgie and Brinkley playing on the jungle gym, laughing.

I would have missed this moment, and a million others if it weren't for that one bee that changed my life that day.

And I wouldn't change that for the world. This is what I am meant to be doing. Today is the day that I finally accepted it and opened my heart to listen to what God has been telling me everyday, for a lot of years. Let's hope I didn't take too long to listen!