2008~

I am normally pretty good with our family Christmas letter and cards. This year, not so much. I did not send out cards or letters this year. Time slipped by and I was just enjoying my family a little too much to pry myself away from play time and get with the program. This blog letter will have to suffice!

2008 brought on a lot for the Jensen family. We had birthday's 8, 7 and 3 this time around and wedding anniversary number 10. Looking back I wonder where the time went and why it goes so fast when things are good. Tommy and I traveled to Las Vegas for a work/play seminar and celebrated our anniversary there. It was the first time that we had gone somewhere for so long, without the kids. They survived well and it will undoubtedly not be our last trip, sans munckins.

Tommy switched work squads and ended up with one heck of an amazing group of men and women working for him. We are lucky that they truly work together as a family and look out for each other. Most have become fast friends with us and we are lucky to have them in our own family now.

Jax and Brinkley sailed through school, as usual. I don't think I could wish for better students. Both have brought home straight A's since kindergarten and it just keeps getting better for them. We wished 2nd and 1st grade goodbye and enjoyed one heck of a hot summer. Swimming and playing, wave pools and friends rounded out what is a short summer for my little ones. School started back in July and we were on a schedule, once again.

Fall break brought on Disneyland for our family. It was an amazing time for all of us. We got to spend time with two sets of Grammies and Grampies and we just had a blast. Upon returning, I started Justice in speech therapy. Being our third little man, he is spoiled rotten and was not talking as well as I would have liked. It has turned out to be a great experience and he really enjoys going to school like his big brother and sister. I anticipate it coming to an end sometime in the near future and he will start pre-school a few days a week.

The holidays brought on all the glitter and fun we all know and love. Thanksgiving was with Kelly and her family and we took on Chrstmas at our house. We love this tradition and actually don't even mind the mess the hurricane, known as Grammie Diane, leaves behind.

Life in the Jensen house is good these days. We are healthy and happy and planning a ton of things for 2009. We hope to visit lots of friends and family and enjoy what we have been blessed with.

We wish you a wonderful 2009 and as always, we love visitors so come and visit....and stay for awhile!

All our love,
The Jensen Family
Tommy, DeAnna, Jax, Brinkley and Justice

17

My kids have come to grips with our newest Christmas tradition. It started about three years ago. Alas, it is still going strong.

Two years ago I forgot to wrap, let alone give out, 5 Christmas presents. I vowed that it would never happen again.

Last year I forgot to give out 11 presents. Brinkley found one behind the drapes in my bedroom in July. Pudgie had a blast opening it.

I found the 10 presents this year, from last year. At least it was before Christmas, that they were found. They were good. They had been hiding ever so quietly, in my entertainment center and leather storage benches, in my bedroom. Again, this was never going to happen to me, ever..........

I was gonna be good this year and triple check for lagging packages. I was gonna make sure that I would get them all out for everyone. I was doing it all alone so, really? Who was I kidding?

I am up to 17 presents that I have found since Christmas. (I mean seriously??...Four flippen days and I couldn't find them on the right night???) Maybe I really should be on the Bad list.....................
Sheesh!


**Now it is getting irritating. I am up to 21 forgotten presents. My sister thought it was funny until she found 7 of her own at her house. At least I know it runs in the family!!!

The "OTHER" list....

If you ask Brinkley, she will proudly boast, "My Mom didn't make Santa's GOOD list this year!" Boy, this makes me really proud to hear. I have no idea why she started telling those that will listen, but this is her statement anywhere and everywhere, to everyone, no matter where we go.

In fact, she will gladly tell you that her Daddy also made the, "BAD LIST," as well. He has not heard her tell everyone yet, but I am sure that he will, eventually. You see, Santa didn't leave Mommy and Daddy anything under the tree this year. He usually throws in a few little trinkets here and there. Not this year. There was not one single thing for either of us and Brinkley took notice immediately on Christmas morning.

It was brought to everyones attention all day long on Christmas and then brought up again, at the gym today and outside while playing with their friends. It sure makes me sound like a wonderful mom and wife, let me tell you.

After two days of hearing this I finally had to explain that Santa has been doing research for Mommy and Daddy on a few things for next year. Two things, to be exact. I told her that Mommy had to put in a special order for her Christmas present and Daddy did as well, even though he has not really decided upon his present yet.

So Binky Doll, Mommy and Daddy are on the Good List... We just have to wait for our belated Christmas presents..... Daddy's does not have a picture yet.. but Mommy's could possibly look something like this..........

Even though it may get here in February, who would complain about a late Christmas present like this?

The Good List

Looks like all three of my sweet munchies landed on the good list this year.

I prefer to think of it as......

Crazy Santa!

This was only round two.

Then my mom showed up and this happened..........

We like to call it

Round Three.....The final Battle

And We LOVE IT!!!!

Merry Christmas to all!

The Eve...Minus One

As is our tradition, we loaded up the truck and headed to Grammie and Grampie Jensen's house to celebrate Christmas Eve with them. We were minus one. At first it was fine and the kids were very understanding. It was about 30 minutes into the ride that they really realized that this year was different. Then it started to sink in.


Daddy was missing.


Daddy would not be able to eat with us and would not get to watch everyone open presents as a family. It affected Binky the most.


Dinner was great and the kids had a blast opening presents and playing, and playing and playing. It was still in the back of their minds that their Daddy was not with them. They kept asking for him and watching through the windows. It was actually a little sad.


Daddy finally got to join us for a little bit of family time at 9:00, before heading back into work. We are lucky that he allows his squad to join family and friends, within the city, on holidays. That way, we got him for 45 minutes tonight.


Trying to make the most of it... the Jensen kids did what any normal kid would do on Christmas Eve (well...not really..) ... they hopped into Daddy's supervisor truck and turned on all the lights and played til there hearts were content with the police toys.


Ultimately the night ended with Binky crying herself to sleep on the way home since Daddy had to go back to work and Pudgie cried everytime he saw a "WE OOOOHHH WE OOOOHHH," thinking his Daddy was coming home with us.


I am pretty sure that they will be fine in the morning... Something tells me Santa had them on the GOOD list this year.

Nothing...

I am embarrassed to say that I am behind on my Christmas cards, my holiday goodies, my gifts for friends, my gifts for family and my yearly Holiday letter. Very far behind.....

What have I been doing that has gotten me so far behind you might ask?

Nothing

Nada

Nil

Zilch

Zero

I have done nothing at all, except wake my little munchies up early every morning of their Christmas Break and take them begrudgingly to the gym.

Then we rush home so we can all do absolutely nothing together.

We rush to get drinks and snacks and whatever we may need to be outside and go, go, go. I am just enjoying the laughter of my kids and sometimes I even enjoy the sound of the little spats that rise out of too much togetherness. It has been a long time since I can actually say I have enjoyed doing nothing.

We have turned what is usually the stressful holiday hustle and bustle into days filled with snowballs (thanks to 40+ tons of snow trucked in to the school behind us for the church that meets there on Sundays) and bike riding, running while shooting the nerf guns, playing on the ride on motorcycle and hummer until the batteries are so dead they won't even move..... and drinking lots of hot chocolate.

I should be finishing up the wrapping of presents or baking the goodies that will ultimately sabotage my fat loss goals for the 3rd of January.. but I am not. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and I am sure that we will, once again, be outside playing and laughing and running and smiling... and I will love it.

After all, sunny days like we have been having (except for the rain in the evening yesterday) are a dime a dozen in the winter and when you can still get pink cheeks on Christmas Eve from the heat.... why would I slave over a stove?

So for me, hanging with Jax, Brinkley and Pudgie..playing Christmas Bingo and doing nothing at all is absolutely perfect.

For me...

That is Something!!!!!

Hot Dogs, Woobies .....

AND HOCKEY!!!!!!!!

Wow, it was go, go, go.... all weekend for this family. We spent most of the night in Glendale watching the Coyotes play. It was the National Salute to Law Enforcement Night and we couldn't beat the half price tickets and all the freebies of the night. Each of us got free food and drinks and woobies too! (Of course, our family ended up with 9 woobies.... I never know how this happens :)~ but it always does!!) Thanks Mom, Dad, and the Cappucci family, for joining us in all the fun.

I think my kids could easily become big fans of this game... either that or they are just getting pointers on how to fight.... because there was a lot of that during the game!

Ready or not.... here comes Christmas!!!

Choo-chie Park

'Tis the season for family, fun, lights, love, laughter.... and children that run around like they are main-lining speed and liquid sugar all at the same time, and I love it.

Tonight we went to the railroad park in Scottsdale to see Pudgie's favorite Choo-Chie all decked out in lights and the man himself, SANTA.

Grammie and Grampie Jensen joined us for the fun and we had a blast. There were characters galore out for the kids to see. At one point, both Jax and Brinkley both said it was like Disneyland. The Shrek kinda freaked me out. I am hoping that Disney did not approve of this costume designers take on what he should look like. I am almost embarassed to say that my little Pudgie had no idea who Cookie monster was. He just kept saying, "Mommy, blue monster now!" Alas, we are not a PBS family. So much for, "C is for COOKIE."

This weekend is going to be a busy one for this family! On to tomorrow night!!!

Solo Friday...

I was so lucky to be on my own tonight that I was actually kinda sad. Thanks to Grammie and Grampie Jensen, who took all three munchies right after school, so I could get to gettin' on my Christmas stuff that I absolutely needed to finish. I had a million and five things to do, Tommy was working the DUI task force with his entire squad, so I got the chance to fly solo anywhere and everywhere I wanted to go tonight.


Problem was:


As I got off the freeway at McDowell and the 101, because traffic was absolutely insane, I watched the Gilbert motorsquad turn onto Hayden, all 6 of them, in unison, and I was so sad. I remember how incredibly fun task force time is and I knew what a great time all 8 members of Tommy's squad were going to have tonight. Times like this just grate on my heart and I miss it so dang much.


I didn't get to talk to Tommy all night, thanks to a dead cell phone, but it was probably better that way. It had been a long week and seeing those guys just flooded back a lot of memories. Memories I knew I was going to re-live come wake up time when Tommy would tell me the tales of his night! And that he did.


Thankfully, the 4, two man (and one woman) cars, known as ADAM units, took 6 very drunk individuals off the road and arrested quite a few more people for other things. I love the stories and hearing what an amazing group of people Tommy has working for him. It still makes me cringe to hear people are still drinking and driving (Tommy's girl blew over a .20) with the laws as strict as they are.


I am so proud to say that I give up my husband, an average of 70 hours a week, to drunk drivers, drug dealers, dirtbags and simply stated, stupid humans, so my kids can play and sleep in safety everyday. Thankfully, all these men and women are willing to give up their time with their families, as well.

You guys and are, seriously, LOVED dearly!!!!

Here's to volunteering to work for no pay!

Sunrise

6 YEARS
9 MONTHS
14 DAYS

(BUT WHO'S COUNTING?)

It is finally over. Good, Bad, or Indifferent.. It is done. I can't change what happened. I can't fix any of the lingering damage. Doctors can not fix the lingering damage. I can choose to be bitter or I can move on. I have not been able to move on simply because it has been hanging over my head for all this time. Lurking in the back of my mind. Keeping me awake at night and stealing some of my happiness. It has made me a screaming lunatic some days and others, simply, a sad woman. I can choose to let it consume me and eat away at my soul or I can let it go. It was not my choice to have it last this long. I have to deal with it for the rest of my life as it is. To have it gripping me until someone else decides how damaged I really am has had me at my wits end forever. Stealing precious happy moments from my family.. from me. Some days it felt like my sanity was at stake.

Having to take time to verbally re-live every detail was excruciating. Head to toe damage. The lasting effects. The trauma aftermath. The physical pain and the emotional wreck I have been. The why's and what's and how's. The poking and prodding and looking and oogling. It has been enough to put even someone like me into place where darkness could eventually win out. Where solitary seems perfect and simple.

For now, it is done. Forever, really, it is done. Today I had to re-live every aspect of my motorcycle accident. I can always find the good in things... today, that was hard.

To my family... I am so sorry for the crazy person I have been the past 13 days since we found out about this trial. I have been consumed with sickness at just the thought of having to really talk about it, to complete strangers non-the-less. It is so much easier to laugh it off in everyday conversation..... but to put it out there so graphically... it was not pleasant, nor was it easy for me! It is easy to realize after the fact that I judge people too quickly. Outwardly especially. I don't know what people go through or what really goes on behind closed doors. I do know that my attorney told me that I don't look like a woman with over 42,000 pages of trauma medical history, at first glance. It made me smile... a compliment? POSSIBLY.. but all I could think was, "how about I take my clothes off for you?"

And then I wondered, what would you like someone, like me, to really look like? Especially someone who refuses to damage their family or punish those they love because of something that happened to them?

I don't know what that person should look like. It really doesn't matter. I do know that I have not been the nicest person lately. I have not been the best mom or wife. The stress of this pretty much crippled this family and I should not have let it.

So, from here on out...it will be so much better.

Thanks for putting up with me guys.

The sun will rise tomorrow and I am sure the clouds are gone!!!

Bad BAD Girls....

The first Friday of every month is girls night for a group of women I know. It mostly consists of everyday regular moms that work or stay at home or sometimes we get lucky and even get the single ladies to join in our fun! We bring friends some nights and slowly our circle is growing and it is getting more and more fun every month!

This month I decided, since I have had to miss the past two months, it would be at my house and it would be slightly different because of the Christmas holiday. We normally do some type of recipe exchange... (stop laughing people... I don't exchange mac-n-cheese how to's! I skip the food prep directions! )

So...as if most don't already know... Christmas is the "IT" holiday for me. On that note, I decided to do a white elephant gift exchange at our house for ladies night. BUT, not just any white elephant.. a DIRTY white elephant gift exchange. ***GASP***

I can honestly say I have not laughed this hard in a very long time. With my stress level at a ridiculous all-time high, I needed this!!! My wonderful friends came up with some totally hilarious gifts and we just spent the night laughing, drinking, talking and eating my turkey spaghetti dinner and wonderful goodies! It was all about just relaxing and de-stressing before the holiday craziness hits and being with people we could kick up our feet and talk about anything with!!

Thanks to all the Daddy's that took the kids to Chuck E Cheese's for the night and the one Daddy that went to get us more Orange Juice and that Cherry additive!!!! We love you guys!!!

See all you amazing ladies same time, next month!

By Definition......

pro·tec·tor also pro·tect·er (pr-tktr)

NOUN:

1. One who protects; a guardian.
2. A device that protects; a guard.
3. Protector
a. A person who rules a kingdom during the minority of a sovereign.
b. The head of the Commonwealth of England, Scotland, and Ireland from 1653 to 1659.

OR

In Pudgie's case........

HIS DOG TIGGER!

The actual, "not so cute..nor very funny" part of this picture is the fact that I came upstairs to make sure that Pudgie man had not wet the bed. That being Daddy's side of the bed and all, I was good, but I knew that would have made for a somewhat unpleasant morning. So, as I leaned over to check Pudgie, Tigger, yeah... MY Tigger.. MY sweet and innocent Tigger, opened his eyes and snapped at me. I am sure he wasn't awake enough to realize it was me, but holy cow he scared me... and that never happens with this dog. I am so glad he watches our kids like a hawk. I am pretty sure that no one will ever mess with them when he is out!! I love this dog!!